When Spouses Don’t Agree on Money

No marriage is perfect. If you’ve been married past the honeymoon phase, then you’re well aware of that.

Every marriage is bound to have an argument or two. And if you’re like most couples, those “discussions” may very well be about money. Some of those disagreements can point back to our personality styles.

Most of us fall into one of two categories. We’re either a partier or a planner. Sure, some people might have tendencies on both sides. But, for the most part, we lean one way or the other.

In relationships, don’t opposites always seem to attract? So when partiers and planners get married, they might find themselves in the middle of some interesting conversations, especially when one of them (probably the planner!) decides to get serious about managing money and start dumping debt.

In a marriage, one spouse (i.e. the planner) will be better at preparing the budget, but the decision-making needs to be done by both. Both of you should sit down together at the end of each month and talk about the next month’s budget. That’s your budget committee meeting—or “budget date night” if you prefer.

The key to living with each other is to simply realize that you both have a different way of thinking. The other person is not out to ruin all your fun or trash your financial goals. This isn’t a war. It’s a relationship. You’re in this together. We have a lot of fun talking about how to get your spouse on board in the first episode of The Rachel Cruze Show.

Take the time each month to sit down and talk about your goals together. You’re both different for a reason, so use that to your advantage instead of letting it become a point of stress.

This isn’t a war. It’s a relationship. You’re in this together.

Talk. Communicate. Be open to each other’s opinions. If you’re the planner, be willing to have a “splurge” category in your budget that allows the partier to have a little fun. If you’re the partier, be willing to rein in your spending.

If one person is making all the money decisions, you’re just setting yourself up for problems.

That’s how a parent-child relationship is supposed to work, not a relationship between spouses.

I promise that this is doable. In fact, it’s the only way to win with money in a relationship. Partiers and planners must unite!

If you want a fun way to get on the same page with your spouse when it comes to your money, come to my event Money and Marriage.