How to Raise Good Kids without Breaking the Bank


Transcript

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- All right, you guys.

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It's a very uncertain time right now

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because of the coronavirus

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and everything that's being affected.

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Whether it's your health or your money,

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the world is just—it's insane right now.

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It's crazy.

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But one thing is true,

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that I believe in the
American economy enough

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to tell you that we are gonna be okay.

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I promise.

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We are gonna be okay.

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There is hope still when
it comes to your money.

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Now, there are things
that we cannot control,

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what goes on statewide or in Washington.

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But there's a lot of things
that we can control.

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And what we can control is
what happens in our homes

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and our personal finances.

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So, making sure that we
don't make decisions

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based on fear, but on facts.

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So, this spring,

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all of the episodes of
The Rachel Cruze Show

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were shot before all this happened,

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and you'll see that I was
pregnant during it too,

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and I'm not anymore.

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But it still works.

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I mean, all the content in these episodes,

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they still ring true.

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So, no matter what is
happening in the economy,

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things might be a little bit
harder at times, for sure.

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But I hope this content brings you hope,

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I hope it brings you life,

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and I hope it brings you
some really great tactics

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to help you with your money.

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So, here's today's episode.

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Diapers, snacks, clothes, shoes,

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sports, more snacks, school projects,

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music lessons, after-school
programs, summer camps.

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Kids cost so much money.

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But they don't have to.

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So, today I'm gonna show you

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how to save money on your kids.

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(upbeat music)

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So, it doesn't matter how old they are,

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or what they're interested in,

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kids can cost a lot of money.

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Listen, you're taking
care of a human being,

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and that's awesome.

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But it doesn't have to be so expensive.

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So, today, I'm gonna show you some big ways

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that you can save money on your kids.

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We're gonna cover things
that you don't need

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to waste your money on for a new baby,

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and then a few things that I
personally cannot go without.

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You're gonna hear about the best ways

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your kids can go to college
without going into debt.

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And plus, I've got ABC
correspondent Linsey Davis here

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to share her message
about helping your kids

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focus on what really matters,

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and it doesn't cost anything.

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And since my kids are still little,

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I asked you guys to share
your best money-saving tips

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for school-aged kids,

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and as always, you came through.

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So, we'll get to those later.

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But right now,

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I'm in the season of life
that is all about baby.

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Yes.

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Third time around,

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and let me tell you,

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I've learned a few things.

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(playful piano music)

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So, there's a lot of things
that people tell you

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that you have to buy, and
you feel this pressure

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to spend all this money on stuff.

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And then, at the end of the
day you look, and you're like,

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I wasted so much money

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on all this stuff for a new baby.

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It's a hard reality.

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So, let's just get the record straight.

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There are four things,

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in my opinion—

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again, these are all my opinion—

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that you do not need for a new baby,

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that you do not need
to waste your money on.

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Number one, a wipe warmer.

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No, they're fine.

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I promise, they are fine.

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I don't care if it's 3 p.m. or 3 a.m.,

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they're fine.

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Unless you got a wipe
warmer for a shower gift,

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and you got it for free,

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then sure, you can use it.

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Don't go buy one.

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No, no, no, no, no.

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You don't need to waste
your money on that.

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Number two, expensive baby clothes.

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Listen, in an hour, they're
gonna outgrow the clothes, okay?

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So, they usually wear an outfit,

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especially that first year,

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like once or twice.

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I had so many clothes from Amelia.

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So many clothes.

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And then I passed them on to Caroline.

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And now that it's a boy,

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I just consigned 187 items.

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And I was so excited.

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But guess what?

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Only 86 sold.

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So now I'm stuck with 100 items I can't use,

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that I bought, that have
literally been used once.

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So, someone at Goodwill
in Franklin, Tennessee

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is gonna be very happy if
they have a little girl,

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because there's gonna be a lot
of cute baby girl clothes.

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But again, I wasted so
much money on baby clothes.

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It's just so sad.

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Number three, in the same genre,

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don't waste your money on baby shoes.

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No, no baby shoes.

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When your baby can't walk,

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your baby doesn't need shoes.

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And yet, people spend so much money

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on name-brand shoes like Uggs,

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and Nike, and all these.

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And yeah, I guess it's kind of cute to have

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a little two-week-old
in a pair of high-tops.

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But I don't think so.

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I don't think it's that cute because
they're gonna outgrow them.

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In an hour, they're not
gonna need the shoes,

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and the baby can't walk.

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Do you remember that?

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They can't walk.

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So don't waste your money on baby shoes.

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And last but not least,

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in my opinion, again, the Diaper Genie.

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Yeah, you know, just a Publix bag,

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a Kroger bag, a Whole
Foods bag, a grocery bag,

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anything that you can just
throw old diapers in,

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and then throw it away
at the end of the day,

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or in the midday.

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That's all you need.

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You don't need a fancy little
thing for your diapers, okay?

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Just get a trash bag, it's fine.

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It's all good.

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Now, there are some things
that you really do need.

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And again, this is all my opinion.

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The things that are great investments,

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that will make your life
easier if you have a new baby.

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Number one, SleepSack Swaddle.

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Yes, zip them up.

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They got those little Velcro flaps.

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You put their little arms down,

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and they sleep so well.

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Swaddling, it's the best thing,

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especially when they're newborns.

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They sleep really, really well.

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So, invest in a good swaddle.

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Number two, Aquaphor.

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We have tubes of Aquaphor at our house.

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Lots and lots and lots of Aquaphor.

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Because Aquaphor solves anything.

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From chapped lips to diaper rash

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to whatever you need,

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it solves it.

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We've convinced our kids

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that Aquaphor literally solves everything,

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that Amelia had a mosquito
bite the other day.

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She was like,

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"I need some Aquaphor on it."

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I was like,

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oh, poor thing.

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You don't know it doesn't
take away the itch.

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But if you believe it solves,

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it solves even a mosquito bite.

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So, Aquaphor though,

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really, it's the best thing.

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So get a bunch of Aquaphor.

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Also, cloth diapers for your burp cloths.

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That's right.

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Gerber has a brand,

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and it's a white cloth diaper,

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but don't use it for the diaper,

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use it for the burp cloth,

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because when they spit
up, it absorb so much,

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and they're super cheap.

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You can buy them in bulk.

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I love it.

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Next, I'm gonna get some
haters on this next one,

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but I'm totally confident
and okay with it.

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But Babywise.

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Yeah, it was something I
could not live without.

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It's like a $10 or $15 book on Amazon,

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and it helps you sleep train your baby.

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In fact, the subtitle is,

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On Becoming Babywise: Giving Your Infant 
the Gift of Nighttime Sleep.

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And not just your infant, but you.

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Yes, parent, new parent
of little child, yes.

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You get the gift of nighttime sleep.

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I'm all about sleep training.

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It's one of my spiritual gifts.

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I say it all the time,

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I could be a travel agent or
a sleep trainer for baby.

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It's what I'm good at.

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It really is. And so, I
could not live without it.

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And again, this is
totally to each its own.

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Some people hate the
idea of sleep training,

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that's fine.

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If it's not in your natural bent,

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don't do it. Don't do it.

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Because it may drive you crazy.

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But for Winston and myself,

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we thrive on this kind of stuff,

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and it's helped us.

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Both of our babies have
slept through the night

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at eight weeks.

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And it works.

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It does, it really works.

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But you gotta be committed, okay?

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You gotta be committed.

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Some people say,

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yeah, I kind of did Babywise-ish

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and it didn't work.

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I'm like, yeah.

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That's the -ish mentality.

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That's like some people say,

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we do the Dave-ish plan.

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We're kind of getting out of debt.

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Yeah, no, no, no.

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You gotta be committed.

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So if you do Babywise,

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you've got to commit.

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Alright, and the final.

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Probably the most important thing

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that you need to take care
of while you have an infant

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is making sure that you
have term life insurance.

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No, your baby doesn't
need term life insurance,

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you need term life insurance.

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So, with all the new things
the parents have going on—

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there's so much—

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it's not usually something that
people think about needing.

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So, it is so, so important.

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Even if you're just thinking
about starting a family,

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be thinking about term life insurance.

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And it isn't something

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only parents who work
outside the home need.

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Even if one parent stays at home,

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you both need to make sure
that you have life insurance.

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Because, let's be honest, stay-at-home parents,

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they do a lot for their families.

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And the bottom line is,

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you need to make sure your
loved ones are protected.

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Winston and I personally love
working with Zander insurance.

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They make the process super easy.

0:08:38.710,0:08:41.600
They will walk with you
through every step of the way,

0:08:41.600,0:08:43.020
help shop around for the best rates,

0:08:43.020,0:08:44.040
and make sure that your family

0:08:44.040,0:08:45.600
is getting the right amount of coverage.

0:08:45.600,0:08:47.450
So, go to zander.com,

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or click the link in the show
notes to get started today.

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Okay, babies, they're an area,

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I feel like I'm an expert on.

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I've been doing it for a little while now.

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But once your kids hit
elementary school and beyond,

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it's like a whole other
level of parenting.

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So, I consulted my Facebook group

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to share some of their expert tips

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on saving money in this stage of life.

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So, here's what you guys had to say.

0:09:07.965,0:09:09.027
Alison said,

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"I'm a mom of two boys, ages 11 and 6,

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and you best believe the
6-year old's clothes

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were once worn by his older brother."

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Amanda said,

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"Limiting extra school
activities to just a few."

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Aprille said,

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"Buy snacks in bulk,

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put half of them in the pantry,

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and then hide the other half

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in a stockpile in the basement.

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If they can see it,

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they will eat it all in one sitting."

0:09:30.780,0:09:31.820
That's really good advice.

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Even for your husband,

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it's probably great advice too.

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Rachel said,

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"Consignment for kids."

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That's not me, Rachel.

0:09:37.810,0:09:40.227
It's another Rachel.
But yes, totally agree.

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"And clearance-buy next year's clothes.

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Both my girls are in
the same size clothes."

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Heather said,

0:09:45.923,0:09:47.947
"I say no a lot,

0:09:47.947,0:09:50.497
but we find a lot of free things

0:09:50.497,0:09:51.857
and still have the things we need.

0:09:51.857,0:09:55.077
Teaching them that need trumps want

0:09:55.077,0:09:57.040
is what's really important right now."

0:09:57.040,0:09:57.873
Candice said,

0:09:57.873,0:10:00.637
"I started my 7- and 9-year-olds on commission.

0:10:00.637,0:10:02.047
Now my 7-year-old wants something,

0:10:02.047,0:10:03.847
I just ask if she has the money.

0:10:03.847,0:10:05.057
No more begging.

0:10:05.057,0:10:07.553
My 9-year-old never really
begged for stuff before,

0:10:07.553,0:10:11.220
but he has a bit of cash
sitting in his room."

0:10:11.220,0:10:12.053
I love that.

0:10:12.053,0:10:12.886
That's amazing, Candice.

0:10:12.886,0:10:14.820
Because I talk about that
in Smart Money, Smart Kids,

0:10:14.820,0:10:16.230
putting your kids on commission.

0:10:16.230,0:10:18.810
And I actually have a savings printable

0:10:18.810,0:10:20.040
that your kid can color in

0:10:20.040,0:10:21.180
when they're saving up for something.

0:10:21.180,0:10:24.030
So click the link in
the show notes for that.

0:10:24.030,0:10:24.863
Stephanie said,

0:10:24.863,0:10:26.587
"We have a 10-year-old son.

0:10:26.587,0:10:28.947
We save money by going
to eat at restaurants

0:10:28.947,0:10:30.097
that have 'kids eat free,'

0:10:30.097,0:10:32.067
so our bill is less expensive,

0:10:32.067,0:10:35.120
but we still get to eat out as a family."

0:10:35.120,0:10:36.500
You guys, these are great tips.

0:10:36.500,0:10:38.923
Great money-saving tips for kids.

0:10:38.923,0:10:40.080
I love it.

0:10:40.080,0:10:42.610
Okay, one way to save money on your kids

0:10:42.610,0:10:45.600
is to not pay for their college.

0:10:45.600,0:10:46.930
Because, by the way,

0:10:46.930,0:10:48.420
you are not a bad parent

0:10:48.420,0:10:50.560
if you can't pay for your kid's college.

0:10:50.560,0:10:52.360
Now, obviously, we walk you
through the Baby Steps,

0:10:52.360,0:10:54.575
we want you to be debt-free, funding retirement,

0:10:54.575,0:10:56.190
and funding kids' college.

0:10:56.190,0:10:57.220
Yes, that is the goal.

0:10:57.220,0:10:59.670
But if you don't get there, it is okay.

0:10:59.670,0:11:00.570
And let me tell you,

0:11:00.570,0:11:03.560
it is possible for your child
to pay for their own college.

0:11:03.560,0:11:06.123
So, coming up are a few
stories to prove it.

0:11:09.770,0:11:11.970
- So, my parents had always told us,

0:11:11.970,0:11:13.230
if you're going to school,

0:11:13.230,0:11:14.840
you're gonna pay for it yourself.

0:11:14.840,0:11:16.680
So, I went to the scholarship office

0:11:16.680,0:11:19.380
at the community college I went to,

0:11:19.380,0:11:21.720
and, at the time, I was under 25.

0:11:21.720,0:11:23.440
And if you're under 25,

0:11:23.440,0:11:25.110
your parents' income counts against you.

0:11:25.110,0:11:27.730
So, she told me, in order to get

0:11:27.730,0:11:29.740
any sort of scholarship or financial aid,

0:11:29.740,0:11:32.080
I needed to bring in my dad's tax returns.

0:11:32.080,0:11:33.380
So, I went in there,

0:11:33.380,0:11:35.930
and I handed her my dad's tax returns,

0:11:35.930,0:11:36.970
and she looked at it,

0:11:36.970,0:11:37.930
she laughed,

0:11:37.930,0:11:39.027
handed it back to me, and said,

0:11:39.027,0:11:40.600
"I can't help you, honey."

0:11:40.600,0:11:42.450
And sat back down and started typing.

0:11:42.450,0:11:44.530
And I was just crushed.

0:11:44.530,0:11:46.027
Like, they can't help me.

0:11:46.027,0:11:47.800
I don't have the savings for this.

0:11:47.800,0:11:50.850
I knew I was not going to be
able to afford to go to school

0:11:50.850,0:11:52.490
without a lot of scholarships.

0:11:52.490,0:11:53.970
I applied for scholarships like

0:11:53.970,0:11:55.150
it was going out of style.

0:11:55.150,0:11:56.340
Like the debt snowball,

0:11:56.340,0:11:58.140
there's kind of a scholarship snowball

0:11:58.140,0:12:01.050
where, if you have one scholarship,

0:12:01.050,0:12:01.883
and then you can put that

0:12:01.883,0:12:04.700
on your next scholarship application,

0:12:04.700,0:12:06.420
it gives you more legitimacy,

0:12:06.420,0:12:09.190
and you're more likely to
get the next scholarship.

0:12:09.190,0:12:11.520
And then on the third scholarship,

0:12:11.520,0:12:13.190
you can put that you've got two others,

0:12:13.190,0:12:15.990
and you're more likely to
get the next scholarship.

0:12:15.990,0:12:17.110
So, that's what I ended up doing.

0:12:17.110,0:12:18.700
I got tons of scholarships,

0:12:18.700,0:12:20.680
not because I was so much more qualified

0:12:20.680,0:12:21.513
than everyone else,

0:12:21.513,0:12:23.315
but just because it gave me legitimacy.

0:12:23.315,0:12:25.060
Graduating without debt

0:12:25.060,0:12:27.600
has allowed me to do
so many things in life.

0:12:27.600,0:12:30.530
My husband and I cash flowed a car,

0:12:30.530,0:12:34.600
and paid off $30,000 on
our house in the last year,

0:12:34.600,0:12:36.440
and saved for renovations.

0:12:36.440,0:12:37.740
None of that would have been possible

0:12:37.740,0:12:40.450
if we were under tons of student loans.

0:12:40.450,0:12:41.550
- Whenever my mom

0:12:41.550,0:12:44.600
sat me down and talked
to me about college,

0:12:44.600,0:12:46.590
we started talking about scholarships,

0:12:46.590,0:12:49.550
and I kind of thought that was the only option.

0:12:49.550,0:12:50.960
Basically, my freshman year of high school,

0:12:50.960,0:12:52.117
she sat me down and said,

0:12:52.117,0:12:54.647
"Christina, I love you
and I believe in you,

0:12:54.647,0:12:57.257
but there's just no way that
I can support you financially

0:12:57.257,0:12:58.377
once you graduate from high school.

0:12:58.377,0:12:59.397
So you've got to figure out

0:12:59.397,0:13:00.680
your own way to pay for college."

0:13:00.680,0:13:02.960
So she introduced me to scholarships

0:13:02.960,0:13:04.870
and told me that if I worked really hard,

0:13:04.870,0:13:06.466
that I could get it paid for,

0:13:06.466,0:13:08.850
get college completely
paid for with scholarships.

0:13:08.850,0:13:10.700
So, we just kind of went on that journey.

0:13:10.700,0:13:13.190
We read every book we
could find on the topic.

0:13:13.190,0:13:16.290
We talked to alumni who
had won scholarships.

0:13:16.290,0:13:19.030
We just did as much digging
as we possibly could.

0:13:19.030,0:13:20.410
So, we put together a strategy,

0:13:20.410,0:13:21.310
and throughout high school

0:13:21.310,0:13:24.540
I was just really strategic
about what kind of things I did.

0:13:24.540,0:13:25.900
Making sure I volunteered a lot,

0:13:25.900,0:13:27.340
which I loved.

0:13:27.340,0:13:29.400
I just really built my resume

0:13:29.400,0:13:32.310
to not only be enjoyable
throughout high school,

0:13:32.310,0:13:33.350
but also to stand out

0:13:33.350,0:13:34.820
in the scholarship application process.

0:13:34.820,0:13:37.740
I talked to a lot of kids
who are freshmen in college

0:13:37.740,0:13:40.550
and they were blindsided by
the cost of an education.

0:13:40.550,0:13:42.210
And I think that's a really big struggle.

0:13:42.210,0:13:44.070
So, I always encourage parents

0:13:44.070,0:13:47.240
to have very real
conversations with their kids

0:13:47.240,0:13:48.760
about finances early on.

0:13:48.760,0:13:51.300
Even if they can't pay for
their college education,

0:13:51.300,0:13:52.270
and it feels awkward,

0:13:52.270,0:13:54.050
just go ahead and have those conversations

0:13:54.050,0:13:56.660
so that the kid has enough time to prepare

0:13:56.660,0:13:58.400
and come up with different strategies.

0:13:58.400,0:14:01.330
I mean, if you spend two hours applying

0:14:01.330,0:14:03.710
for a scholarship, and you win $1,000,

0:14:03.710,0:14:05.840
that's like making $500 per hour.

0:14:05.840,0:14:07.350
That's more money than you're gonna make

0:14:07.350,0:14:09.970
in pretty much any other
part-time job in high school.

0:14:09.970,0:14:13.830
So, go ahead and give it a shot
and put yourself out there.

0:14:13.830,0:14:15.350
The fact that I went to college

0:14:15.350,0:14:17.650
without student loans has been amazing.

0:14:17.650,0:14:18.820
It's allowed me the freedom

0:14:18.820,0:14:21.080
to build my own business after college.

0:14:21.080,0:14:24.070
And if I had debt leaving college,

0:14:24.070,0:14:25.590
I wouldn't be able to have the freedom

0:14:25.590,0:14:27.640
to pour back into other people,

0:14:27.640,0:14:30.460
and do something that I'm
really passionate about.

0:14:30.460,0:14:31.910
- I knew that it's a possibility

0:14:31.910,0:14:33.140
you could have student loans,

0:14:33.140,0:14:35.660
but in my family that was never an option.

0:14:35.660,0:14:37.340
So, it was either go to
school and work for it,

0:14:37.340,0:14:39.240
or don't go to school and
choose something else.

0:14:39.240,0:14:40.840
So, I did the one thing
I said I would never do,

0:14:40.840,0:14:43.230
which was live at home and go to school.

0:14:43.230,0:14:44.570
Throughout college I worked

0:14:44.570,0:14:46.720
and had two to three part-time jobs,

0:14:46.720,0:14:49.010
and then by the time I got to senior year,

0:14:49.010,0:14:51.480
scholarships covered
my entire senior year.

0:14:51.480,0:14:53.620
- And I paid for college.

0:14:53.620,0:14:58.140
Well, I've had a job
since I was 14 years old,

0:14:58.140,0:15:01.390
and I've always worked and saved.

0:15:01.390,0:15:02.390
My university work,

0:15:02.390,0:15:03.440
I did it all online.

0:15:03.440,0:15:05.900
So I was able to work and
then do that when I was off.

0:15:05.900,0:15:07.470
The way my parents helped me

0:15:07.470,0:15:10.447
was providing a place
to live through college,

0:15:10.447,0:15:12.060
and that's a huge money saver.

0:15:12.060,0:15:13.330
I couldn't have graduated debt-free

0:15:13.330,0:15:16.940
if I had lived elsewhere
on my own or on campus.

0:15:16.940,0:15:19.490
- I think in our society and our culture,

0:15:19.490,0:15:20.570
parents have a standard

0:15:20.570,0:15:22.150
that they feel like they have to meet,

0:15:22.150,0:15:23.705
that if they don't send
their kid to college

0:15:23.705,0:15:25.850
they're somehow a failure as a parent.

0:15:25.850,0:15:28.220
And so, I think comparison
really creeps in.

0:15:28.220,0:15:29.140
And so, when it comes to that,

0:15:29.140,0:15:31.500
I think that parents
need to take a step back

0:15:31.500,0:15:34.550
and see what is true success as a parent.

0:15:34.550,0:15:35.860
And that's instilling work ethic

0:15:35.860,0:15:38.510
and generosity and
responsibility into your child.

0:15:38.510,0:15:40.080
College is not a promise land,

0:15:40.080,0:15:42.410
and it's not a golden ticket to success.

0:15:42.410,0:15:45.150
So who your child is more important

0:15:45.150,0:15:47.370
than them getting a four-year degree.

0:15:47.370,0:15:50.530
So, our life now, as being
out of school debt-free . . .

0:15:50.530,0:15:51.720
We kind of sat down.

0:15:51.720,0:15:53.440
We've been married for four months.

0:15:53.440,0:15:54.500
There's just freedom.

0:15:54.500,0:15:56.750
And there's just peace.

0:15:56.750,0:15:58.437
- There's no pressure of,

0:15:58.437,0:15:59.377
can we pay the bills,

0:15:59.377,0:16:01.571
or can we pay down our
loans and everything?

0:16:01.571,0:16:03.900
You get to choose what
you spend your money on

0:16:03.900,0:16:05.170
and choose what to save for.

0:16:05.170,0:16:07.560
- Everybody talks about the post-grad life.

0:16:07.560,0:16:08.393
They're like,

0:16:08.393,0:16:09.767
oh my gosh, it's so hard
to be in the workforce.

0:16:09.767,0:16:10.600
It's so hard.

0:16:10.600,0:16:11.433
We were like,

0:16:11.433,0:16:12.547
this is a breeze.

0:16:12.547,0:16:14.020
This is so fun.

0:16:14.020,0:16:17.600
Because we don't have to go to school

0:16:17.600,0:16:19.819
and work two or three jobs or all that.

0:16:19.819,0:16:21.480
It's a break to us.

0:16:21.480,0:16:24.970
So, it's kind of the opposite of a lot
of people that we know.

0:16:24.970,0:16:27.650
But man, it's a fun life.

0:16:27.650,0:16:28.636
- See, I told you there is proof

0:16:28.636,0:16:31.970
that your child can go
to college debt-free,

0:16:31.970,0:16:33.140
even if you're not able to help.

0:16:33.140,0:16:34.990
See, it's an amazing thing.

0:16:34.990,0:16:35.823
Okay, guys.

0:16:35.823,0:16:37.400
We've talked a lot about how to save money

0:16:37.400,0:16:38.340
for your kids today,

0:16:38.340,0:16:40.600
but you know that I
love to get to the heart

0:16:40.600,0:16:42.080
of every issue we talk about.

0:16:42.080,0:16:43.760
Because where you spend your money

0:16:43.760,0:16:46.540
reveals what you truly value in life,

0:16:46.540,0:16:50.140
and kids are a great
thing to value, obviously.

0:16:50.140,0:16:51.220
But you don't have to spend

0:16:51.220,0:16:53.850
a ton of money to raise good humans,

0:16:53.850,0:16:56.700
which is exactly why I'm
bringing on Linsey Davis today

0:16:56.700,0:16:58.573
to talk about how to do just that.

0:17:02.140,0:17:03.230
Linsey, thanks for being here.

0:17:03.230,0:17:04.360
- Thank you so much for having me.

0:17:04.360,0:17:05.193
- So fun.

0:17:05.193,0:17:06.840
You are one of my favorites,

0:17:06.840,0:17:08.220
because I love GMA.

0:17:08.220,0:17:09.230
It's my morning show.

0:17:09.230,0:17:10.063
- Okay.

0:17:10.063,0:17:11.390
- It's what I watch.
- Glad to hear that.

0:17:11.390,0:17:12.890
Thank you.

0:17:12.890,0:17:14.740
- Yes. ABC is part of my heart.

0:17:14.740,0:17:16.420
So you're a working mom?

0:17:16.420,0:17:17.880
- Working mom, Yes.

0:17:17.880,0:17:19.250
- But whenever I have moms on,

0:17:19.250,0:17:20.083
that have full-time jobs,

0:17:20.083,0:17:21.240
I'm always like, okay.

0:17:21.240,0:17:24.390
So, I love tips and
tricks of how you do it.

0:17:24.390,0:17:27.770
So, what are a couple of
things that you think about

0:17:27.770,0:17:30.050
when you think about being a working mom,

0:17:30.050,0:17:31.520
that are principles in your life?

0:17:31.520,0:17:36.020
- Well, I think I have
become a master multi-tasker.

0:17:36.020,0:17:40.220
And so while I'm working on a story,

0:17:40.220,0:17:42.260
I'm also making sure that

0:17:42.260,0:17:44.240
things are taken care of at home,

0:17:44.240,0:17:46.830
with my son in soccer
and after-school programs

0:17:46.830,0:17:47.663
and all of that.

0:17:47.663,0:17:51.610
And just doing more than one
thing at the same time,

0:17:51.610,0:17:54.204
it just kind of becomes a constant.

0:17:54.204,0:17:56.740
And I think it's just something you just
put your head down and just do.

0:17:56.740,0:17:57.573
- Totally.

0:17:57.573,0:18:00.900
- It's not really writing
out the things on the to-do list,

0:18:00.900,0:18:01.977
as much as it is just like,

0:18:01.977,0:18:02.834
we gotta do this, and checking it off the list.

0:18:02.834,0:18:04.290
- There's not even time.

0:18:04.290,0:18:05.350
Yeah, absolutely.

0:18:05.350,0:18:07.770
So, on this show, we talk a lot about money,

0:18:07.770,0:18:11.740
and talking about the
value of even just giving.

0:18:11.740,0:18:13.440
And when you give to others,

0:18:13.440,0:18:16.010
you really are valuing that person a lot.

0:18:16.010,0:18:19.040
And so, you're really
passionate about teaching kids

0:18:19.040,0:18:20.540
about valuing other people.

0:18:20.540,0:18:22.190
And so, I just want to know,

0:18:22.190,0:18:23.530
where did that all come from for you?

0:18:23.530,0:18:25.040
- Well, one thing, I'll say,

0:18:25.040,0:18:26.610
especially having a child,

0:18:26.610,0:18:29.130
it has made me better.

0:18:29.130,0:18:32.670
And one thing I started
right before my son was born,

0:18:32.670,0:18:34.170
was a holiday charity event.

0:18:34.170,0:18:36.360
This was a love project.

0:18:36.360,0:18:39.430
It became more important
for me once I had a child,

0:18:39.430,0:18:42.430
so that he would see me
and my husband doing this.

0:18:42.430,0:18:45.790
And so that now, he's excited about giving,

0:18:45.790,0:18:48.570
and even we'll round up his toys

0:18:48.570,0:18:50.540
and things that he might not be using,

0:18:50.540,0:18:52.367
and then we'll go out
shopping and say like,

0:18:52.367,0:18:53.497
"Well, what would you like?

0:18:53.497,0:18:54.377
As a 4-year-old boy,

0:18:54.377,0:18:55.770
what do you think that another

0:18:55.770,0:18:57.260
5-year-old boy would like?"

0:18:57.260,0:18:58.520
And then he has to give it away.

0:18:58.520,0:19:00.361
The thing that he would want the most,

0:19:00.361,0:19:01.300
and give it away.

0:19:01.300,0:19:04.140
And I think that that
is what fulfillment is.

0:19:04.140,0:19:06.960
That is what is really being rich, right?

0:19:06.960,0:19:10.050
In the end, as long as your
needs can be met, right?

0:19:10.050,0:19:13.490
And that really is the
greatest thing, right?

0:19:13.490,0:19:16.200
When you have,

0:19:16.200,0:19:17.180
and even when you don't have,

0:19:17.180,0:19:20.160
but being able to give to other people.

0:19:20.160,0:19:22.610
And I think that that's just
such an important message.

0:19:22.610,0:19:25.120
If there are like three things
that I can impart to my son,

0:19:25.120,0:19:26.480
that is one of the top most.

0:19:26.480,0:19:27.715
- Yes, oh, I love that.

0:19:27.715,0:19:28.570
And are living with that open hand.

0:19:28.570,0:19:29.897
But you wrote a book,

0:19:29.897,0:19:31.320
"One Big Heart."

0:19:31.320,0:19:32.490
Which, I was just telling you before we started this,

0:19:32.490,0:19:34.640
even the illustrations,

0:19:34.640,0:19:35.820
you guys, are just,

0:19:35.820,0:19:36.653
it's so great.

0:19:36.653,0:19:38.240
Okay, so tell me about the book.

0:19:38.240,0:19:39.073
- Yeah.

0:19:39.073,0:19:39.906
So "One Big Heart"

0:19:39.906,0:19:41.500
is celebration of being
more alike than different.

0:19:42.750,0:19:45.450
I call it a reinforcement for children

0:19:45.450,0:19:47.380
of what I think that they already know.

0:19:47.380,0:19:51.340
Because, inherently, people will often
say that kids don't see color.

0:19:51.340,0:19:52.680
And I totally disagree with that.

0:19:52.680,0:19:54.130
I think the kids do see color,

0:19:54.130,0:19:55.910
they just don't assign a value to it.

0:19:55.910,0:19:57.800
It's quite often adults who do that,

0:19:57.800,0:20:00.757
and adults that make the
different separation and like,

0:20:00.757,0:20:03.090
oh, we're different because of this.

0:20:03.090,0:20:05.752
And so, because I do believe
that kids see color,

0:20:05.752,0:20:09.090
I wanted to create a book
where we would talk about it.

0:20:09.090,0:20:10.700
And it's not like the elephant in the room

0:20:10.700,0:20:11.533
that you're just like,

0:20:11.533,0:20:13.390
well, they're too young
to know and talk about.

0:20:13.390,0:20:14.223
So, it's like,

0:20:14.223,0:20:15.667
hey, we do have different skin colors,

0:20:15.667,0:20:16.697
and we have different features,

0:20:16.697,0:20:19.247
and we have different likes
and dislikes and personalities.

0:20:19.247,0:20:21.550
We have different backgrounds
and beliefs, right?

0:20:21.550,0:20:24.150
But God gave us all this special gift.

0:20:24.150,0:20:25.180
He gave us one big heart,

0:20:25.180,0:20:26.500
and that's the most unique part.

0:20:26.500,0:20:27.940
Because that's where the love starts.

0:20:27.940,0:20:29.017
- Yes.
- Yeah.

0:20:29.017,0:20:30.620
- That's so, so good.

0:20:30.620,0:20:31.740
What it does, it just like . . .

0:20:31.740,0:20:34.180
It brings back the value system

0:20:34.180,0:20:36.010
of what we were created with, right?

0:20:36.010,0:20:39.040
And i feel like we get tainted in
our culture and our world

0:20:39.040,0:20:41.410
by everything from social
media and media, all of it.

0:20:41.410,0:20:42.370
And I'm like, "No."

0:20:42.370,0:20:44.710
When you go back to the basics
of how you were created,

0:20:44.710,0:20:45.543
like what you're saying,

0:20:45.543,0:20:47.310
I'm like, it's just a beautiful thing.

0:20:47.310,0:20:49.600
And to be able to instill
that in your kids,

0:20:49.600,0:20:51.870
and letting them see the value in others.

0:20:51.870,0:20:53.060
So, how do we teach our kids

0:20:53.060,0:20:56.140
to not assign a value to
things that don't matter?

0:20:56.140,0:20:58.250
- I think that the main thing is exposure.

0:20:58.250,0:21:00.940
I think the kids need
to see children, adults,

0:21:00.940,0:21:03.280
people who look like them
and who don't look like them.

0:21:03.280,0:21:05.800
You know, a lot of people have
gotten the book and people,

0:21:05.800,0:21:06.937
their children have said like,

0:21:06.937,0:21:08.260
"This person looks just like me."

0:21:08.260,0:21:09.150
And they celebrate that.

0:21:09.150,0:21:10.770
And I think that should be celebrated.

0:21:10.770,0:21:13.260
But I think also, what we
should look at is kids

0:21:13.260,0:21:14.510
who don't look like them,

0:21:14.510,0:21:17.200
and seeing that and
normalizing that, right?

0:21:17.200,0:21:20.392
And so, I think that, if you
happen to live in an area where

0:21:20.392,0:21:22.200
the children are not very diverse,

0:21:22.200,0:21:24.860
whether it's at school or the supermarket

0:21:24.860,0:21:26.090
or church or synagogue,

0:21:26.090,0:21:27.190
and I think that as parents,

0:21:27.190,0:21:30.650
it's our job to make sure that
we're looking in the toolbox

0:21:30.650,0:21:32.890
to figure out what else
can we show our children.

0:21:32.890,0:21:34.903
So books and toys,

0:21:34.903,0:21:35.736
the dolls that you get,

0:21:35.736,0:21:39.060
they don't often all have to
look just like your child.

0:21:39.060,0:21:40.290
I think that it's really important,

0:21:40.290,0:21:42.410
especially if you don't
live in a diverse area,

0:21:42.410,0:21:44.982
to make sure that the books,
and the characters in the books,

0:21:44.982,0:21:47.190
reflect who they are, and don't.

0:21:47.190,0:21:48.740
There was an essay a
while ago that I'd read,

0:21:48.740,0:21:51.460
it was windows mirrors
and sliding glass doors.

0:21:51.460,0:21:53.630
And the idea is that the
children need the mirror

0:21:53.630,0:21:55.500
so they can see themselves
reflected in books.

0:21:55.500,0:21:57.460
They need a window so
they can peer into a world

0:21:57.460,0:21:59.740
that may be unfamiliar with their own.

0:21:59.740,0:22:01.733
And if that window really works,

0:22:01.733,0:22:03.400
it's able to be a sliding glass door

0:22:03.400,0:22:05.490
to transport them into that world, right?

0:22:05.490,0:22:07.890
- And so that's how we can see books,

0:22:07.890,0:22:10.020
as ways to expose our children.

0:22:10.020,0:22:11.290
And I think that that's where it starts.

0:22:11.290,0:22:13.770
Because as you look at hate crimes

0:22:13.770,0:22:16.480
that are on the rise in
this country, for example.

0:22:16.480,0:22:18.460
A lot of that I think
comes from the unknown,

0:22:18.460,0:22:19.470
fear of the unknown.

0:22:19.470,0:22:21.700
And so if the child is exposed to people

0:22:21.700,0:22:23.180
who have different cultures,

0:22:23.180,0:22:24.013
different beliefs,

0:22:24.013,0:22:24.846
different religions,

0:22:24.846,0:22:26.340
I think that commonality,

0:22:26.340,0:22:30.030
again, you won't decide
it's this we versus them,

0:22:30.030,0:22:31.820
us versus they attitude.

0:22:31.820,0:22:34.878
- Yeah, cause the unknown is
what creates that scary tales.

0:22:34.878,0:22:35.911
- Yes, exactly.

0:22:35.911,0:22:38.290
- And you just remove that
completely by normalizing it.

0:22:38.290,0:22:39.430
- Right.

0:22:39.430,0:22:40.263
- So good.

0:22:40.263,0:22:42.787
Oh, Linsey. you guys,
seriously, check it out.

0:22:42.787,0:22:43.870
"One Big Heart."

0:22:43.870,0:22:45.570
beautiful, beautiful book.

0:22:45.570,0:22:46.510
Not just the illustrations,

0:22:46.510,0:22:48.910
but obviously the message that's in it.

0:22:48.910,0:22:50.120
It's just absolutely fabulous.

0:22:50.120,0:22:51.522
So, thank you so much for coming on.

0:22:51.522,0:22:52.355
- Thank you.

0:22:52.355,0:22:53.188
Appreciated it.

0:22:53.188,0:22:54.028
- So appreciate it.

0:22:54.028,0:22:56.001
And you can get this
wherever books are sold.

0:22:56.001,0:22:58.584
(upbeat music)

0:23:02.480,0:23:02.980
- All right.

0:23:02.980,0:23:04.154
What an awesome episode.

0:23:04.154,0:23:06.050
Now, even if you're
not a parent right now,

0:23:06.050,0:23:08.850
I hope that you can tuck some
of these tips away for later,

0:23:08.850,0:23:10.850
because hopefully they will help you.

0:23:10.850,0:23:11.683
And let me just say,

0:23:11.683,0:23:12.750
parents out there,

0:23:12.750,0:23:15.160
you're doing better
than you think you are.

0:23:15.160,0:23:16.620
Some days the struggle is real,

0:23:16.620,0:23:17.880
but you're doing a great job.

0:23:17.880,0:23:19.230
And remember with kids,

0:23:19.230,0:23:21.410
more is caught than taught.

0:23:21.410,0:23:22.790
Thank you so much to Linsey Davis,

0:23:22.790,0:23:25.270
for coming on and sharing
her incredible heart.

0:23:25.270,0:23:26.320
And if you've not checked out

0:23:26.320,0:23:28.290
the podcast version of my show,

0:23:28.290,0:23:29.480
make sure to do that.

0:23:29.480,0:23:30.560
It's really fun.

0:23:30.560,0:23:32.450
And make sure you subscribe
to my YouTube channel,

0:23:32.450,0:23:35.810
and follow my Facebook page
for more great money tips.

0:23:35.810,0:23:38.860
Now, if you're looking for
the free savings, printable,

0:23:38.860,0:23:40.640
or anything that I've
mentioned on the show today,

0:23:40.640,0:23:43.260
you can find the link in the show notes.

0:23:43.260,0:23:45.420
And, as always, make sure to take control

0:23:45.420,0:23:48.053
of your money and create a life you love.