How to Stop Spending So Much Money


- - This episode is all about spending money. We're gonna talk about why we spend, when we spend, and what to spend on, so stay tuned. So this episode is all about spending money. And if you're a spender like me, you're gonna be very excited about this episode because spending money is so fun. So later in the episode, we're gonna talk through some items that will make your life easier with Woman's Day. Then were gonna actually talk about the appropriate times for you to spend out of your emergency fund, so what is technically an emergency. And last, we're gonna hear from an amazing couple that spent a little bit more money than what they had, so they ended up going into debt but now they are in the middle of their debt-free journey, and I cannot wait for you to hear how much they have already paid off, you guys. It's so fun. So when you think through, okay, I'm gonna be spending some money, here are really a few filters that you think through, like why do we spend? Why do we spend money? Well number one, we spend money because it's necessary. We have to spend money on things like food, shelter, utilities, transportation. I call those your four walls. So in your budgets, we're gonna budget, so you need to download EveryDollar, but in your budgets those are first four things that you do when you spend money, because you wanna make sure these are covered. These are your needs, these are your necessities. Now we also spend money because we think that it's gonna make us happy. We see things we want and we're like you know what? If I could have that, I'd be happy. And like we've talked about many times on the show, you can buy fun, but you can't buy happiness. But sometimes in our culture, in our country, we think okay, if it's bigger, if it's better, if it's nicer everything will be better and it'll make me happy. It'll fill this little void that I have. But when that's us, it's like we're a rat in a wheel running, running, running and getting nowhere because it is so true that money cannot buy happiness. It can buy fun, though, lots of fun things, which is why the last reason we spend money is the enjoy life, 'cause stuff is not bad. Remember, it's okay to have some nice stuff, just don't let your nice stuff have you. But I can enjoy life, let me tell you. Yes I can, and I can enjoy good dinners. I can enjoy great clothes. You can have fun with money and enjoy it, but you wanna make sure you're doing it within a plan, and that's what's key because if you're like me, sometimes you can go off the rails when you see a really good sale. I don't know if you're like me, but when I see that something is 40% off, I basically feel like it's free. I don't know how many times I've gone to Winston and I'm like babe, I saved $152. He's like, "Well, how much did you spend?" And I'm like doesn't matter! I saved money. And this happened to me last week. And when I say last week, I mean last week I saw Baby Gap. Mm-hmm, Baby Gap and Gap Kids which then means their parent company, Banana Republic, too, all had the same little sale going on and I was like oh wow, the girls have to have matching outfits because one of my things is like okay, I had two girls. And so right when Caroline was born, when we was like three, six months I was like oh, I'm gonna buy all these cute outfits together. But when a baby's like three months old they're like this, they cannot even hold up their head yet, and I'm like this looks so stupid 'cause Caroline is in something that should be on a three year old, but she's three months old and it's just not working. So I went and I said I'm gonna halt buy matching outfits until Caroline can walk. Sweet little Caroline is walking around now so now I'm like matching outfits, now I can do it. And I went a little crazy. Mm-hmm, I did. So much so that I have a confession to make. I overspent on my clothing budget, mm-hmm. Came into EveryDollar, I saw it, and I thought what do I do? And then I thought well, what do I do? I start splitting up this transaction, people, right? Some can go in miscellaneous, some can go in Caroline's category, some can go in my category because I technically was the one that bought it. I'm so sacrificial. I gave the girls part of my budget for the month so that they could have cute clothes. But all that to sayI can go crazy, but that's what important you guys is sometimes you're gonna have to finagle the budget every now and then, but as long as you have a plan, you can spend money and find some great deals. You just have to be wise about it, because I can fall into the black hole of 40% off sales, 'cause it's so good, but remember when you have a plan, you have a budget, you can spend things with freedom. It's like hey, it's okay. So here are some really fun things that you can spend money on. I'm so excited about the next segment because these products are amazing, and they're going to make your life better. They're just great so check it out. Well, I'm so excited about this segment because there are all these incredible household items that are inexpensive that you need. And Susan Spencer who is the Editor-in-Chief of Woman's Day is here with us today to explain them all. So thanks for being here. - Well, thanks so much for having me, Rachel. So I've got so many products to talk about, but these are all winners of the Woman's Day Great Value Awards. So every year we put together the ultimate list of problem-solving products that don't break the bank. - Brilliant. Well I've gotten a sneak peek of a few of them, so I can't wait to see them and demonstrate them. Okay, so the first one is? - The first one is the Ziploc Space Bag. It costs 16.99. You get a set of six in this. And basically what this is good for is for saving space in your closet. Now, if your closet looks like mine it's a giant explosion and I always want it to be more organized. So you use the vacuum attachment to kind of compress it. - And just like your regular vacuum? - Just your regular vacuum and it just kinda compresses and sucks all the air out. - You know, I've seen these and I've never in person actually seen it. Are you gonna open it? - I'm gonna open this right now. Stand back. - I know, I'm so nervous. - And you're gonna see what happens when all the amazing. You can really see how much space it saves. I mean, this is a pretty big blanket. - Oh wow. - Here we go. - You guys, that is amazing. So space-saving bags, we all need them now. That's amazing. - So next we have, this is Bar Keepers Friend. It's a soft cleanser. Now this is 136-year-old brand. Its been around for a really long time and this is actually amazing. It shines everything. - Yes. Well I have the powdered version and I'm obsessed with it. So this is like-- - This is a soft cleanser. It's a little bit easier to use on vertical surfaces. This is great on stainless steel, which if you've got a lot of little fingertips on your stainless steel fridge, it's really good for it. - Okay, so this, I'm gonna pump this out. - I'm gonna hold this for you. So this has actually been through the dishwasher before and you can see it's still got a lot of guck and grime here. - Okay, how much do I put on? - Just a little bit. That's right, and just use the wipe and it's just gonna disappear. It's amazing how quickly it cleans 'em. - [Rachel] Yes. - So this is also great. One of our reader testers used this to shine up an old, antique brass lamp and it made it almost as good as new, so I feel like this is a good secret weapon if you're a thrifter or if you buy things at garage sales and they're a little bit grody and you wanna-- - Shine it up. - Exactly. - Love it, love it. - So this is the next one. These are Behr Swipes and these cost $5.98. And this is a miracle product. We got so excited about this at the office and I've used these at home and they're amazing. And basically what they do and remove scuffs and dirt and things like that from walls without removing the paint, so you don't have to repaint an entire room. I'm actually gonna demonstrate if that's okay with you. - Yes, I'm gonna grab these. - Are you ready for this? - Yes. - Okay. You know, if you have a child who does this, you're not gonna be too happy, but you can use this wipe to actually get rid of this. This is really gonna disappear. - [Rachel] Okay. - This is also really great for shoe scuffs if you have a shoe tree that goes up against a wall. Look at this, it's completely gone. It's an absolute miracle. - Amazing. - And the paint is completely fine. - [Rachel] Completely taken care of, amazing. Amazing. - It's an absolute miracle. - So cheap, too. - And it's really cheap. - That's what I love. - And you get a really big, this is incredible value. You get a whole huge carton of these. Really love those. -The Cruzes need that ASAP, ASAP. - So speaking of cleaning up dirty, grimy things, there's nothing more disgusting than your phone. - Yes. - Right. - Especially after kids grabbin' it. - Exactly, you think about the germs and the bacteria. So these are well-Kept Wipes, and this is a really handy little packet. And this gets rid of dirt on all your technology, fingerprints, everything that just is grimy and gross. There you go. - Amazing, absolutely amazing. - And those cost six to $10. And it's really easy. You can just throw 'em in your purse. - I feel like the Cruzes need bunches of those wipes, 'cause everything feels so gross. That's so good. Okay, so next we have? - Next we have Extreme Post-It Notes. Now, these are really waterproof, super durable versions of Post-It Notes. You feel that. - Oh, yes. - It's kind of a really interesting kind of paper. - [Rachel]It's like a mache or something. - Yeah, it's really interesting. So what we recommend that you use these for is labeling leftovers in your fridge. So if your refrigerator looks like mine, it's got lots of containers in the back, nobody's sure what's in them, nobody touches them, then nobody eats them. It's a huge waste of food. So what I've started doing is putting Post-It Notes on some of the containers so people can see, and I put it on things like this. And these go into the freezer really well, too. And it's just an easy way to label. - Yes, I remember after having babies and people would bring you food and you have all these leftovers, and I would have just regular Post-It Notes, but things would fall off and I'd have like two or three at the bottom. And I was like oh my gosh, what do they go to? I can't remember. - Exactly. - This is excellent. - And it's just a really good way not to waste food. - Yes, I love it. - So finally we have the Duop Mop, and this is 29.99 for a starter kit. - I'm so excited about this one. - This is actually a really great product. - It's really good. - So for 29.99, you get all three of these attachments. Now what's really great about this and what makes it such a Great Value Award Winner is that it's super flexible so you can kinda get into all sorts of nooks and crannies. It also stands on its own. There you go. - Just the most amazing thing ever. - So it's easy to use. And as I said before, when something's easy to use, then it's such great value to you. - So good. Oh Susan, these are so great. I'm not kidding. And all, you guys, so inexpensive. And it makes your life better. - It does. - It makes it easier. - It does. - It saves time and money and I love it, so great. So you guys, make sure to check out the November issue of Woman's Day that's on newsstands today, right now, to get more information on all these great cleaning products and more. And click the link in the description for even more information. Thanks, Susan, so much for being here. This is so great. - So fantastic, thanks. - Guys, let's be real. Being a parent is hard work. Now that I have two daughters of my own, it feels like the to-do list never ends. And as every parent knows, your priorities change and you have to make important decisions for your child's future. That's why term life insurance is a must for every parent. It's so easy to get and it's affordable. What you're looking for is 10 to 12 times your annual income to make sure everyone in your family's taken care of. Winston and I use Zander Insurance. They do all the work for you to find the best prices and options. So go to to get started on a quote today, because that's who we trust to take care of our family. - Why do we fight with the person that we love the most? - What's crazy is one of the leading causes of divorce in America today, money fights and money problems. - Money's the number one source of conflict. It doesn't matter how much you have, a little or a lot, it's still the source of a lot of friction. And what happens to negative feelings that we bury? They have a high rate of resurrection. - It's amazing that money hits us in a place in our marriage that no other subject does. I want you to put yourself back in the driver's seat of your life and your money, because I want you to learn to love your life, not theirs. - Your relationships can only be as healthy as you are. - Don't get on the same page as your spouse just because of your bank account. Do this for your marriage. Weren't those products so fun, you guys? Like the little foam cleaner one. All day, every day, loved it. All right, stick around to the end of this episode to find out how you can possibly win those products. Very exciting. All right, some more spending that you can do is actually when an emergency happens. So spending out of your emergency fund could be a reality for all of you. Now, your emergency fund starting out is just a thousand dollars. Quick and easy until you get out of debt and you list out all of your debt, smallest to largest, do the debt snowball, pay off your debt, everything but the house, and then you're gonna bump up that starter emergency fund to three to six months of expenses and have that tucked away. So there's your emergency funds. Now, I don't want your emotions to trick you into thinking that something is an emergency when it's not. So here are three questions you can ask yourself to figure out is this an emergency? Can I spend out of my emergency fund? Number one, is it unexpected? Christmas, mm-mm, no ma'am. Christmas is not unexpected. December 25th, every year people. You know it's coming. That is not unexpected. Now, your car breaking down on the side of the road, mm-hmm unexpected. I was gonna give you car examples. The only one I know is your tire goes flat. Stuff can happen with the engine and oil and stuff, so if any of that happens and your car doesn't start, unexpected for sure. Number two, is it necessary? Whitening your teeth? No, not necessary. Don't spend out of your emergency for a teeth whitening. Now if you chip your tooth or you tooth goes missing, uh, I'm gonna say it's necessary. Yeah, you might wanna fix that, be great. Number three, is it urgent. Buying a hot tub because it's 40% off, probably not urgent, no, no, no. Unless you're on The Bachelor, that would be urgent. But your water heater breaks then yeah, for sure, let's get that fixed. That's an emergency. So if you're still not sure what a true emergency is, here are a couple of examples. Maybe you've lost your job and you have to pay bills, or you massive, unexpected home damage, like a tree falls on your house, there's a natural disaster or a leaky roof, those are all emergencies, so it's okay to spend out of your emergency fund. That's what it's for. That's what I love about emergency fund. It takes a crisis and turns it into an inconvenience. Now to give you some motivation to fund that emergency fund, check out my free goal tracker and you can color in the progress that you make towards your goals. It's very excited, so make sure to click the link below for that. All right, coming up next is the story of Melvin and Danielle who are currently paying off their debts and they just started their journey two months ago, you guys, and they may or may not have cut up 17 credit cards. So here's their story. - When I finally sat down and totaled everything up-- - I think we were at $96,000 in student loan debt. - The thought of paying off a student loan till the age of 50, 55 just drove me nuts. - It seemed normal. Every time we talked about it, like when we brought it up with our family, they would say student loan debt is a good debt. - A good debt, yeah. I would say before financial peace I felt like I was on a marathon that was never gonna end. I knew the debts would be paid off, but it just felt like this was a lifetime. - I felt just worried and wanting to hide from what we had gotten ourselves into. The minute we decided we were gonna do this, we literally ran with it. - Now after financial peace I feel like there's an end, right, there's hope. - I feel a sense of peace literally has just washed over me. - More so than anything, I definitely feel more connected to her than ever. - All right you guys, thank you so much for being here. I so appreciate it, 'cause your story, when I heard about it I was like I want them to come on the show and talk about your journey, 'cause you're on a very significant journey right now in life. And so, tell me a little bit about where all this began. - I mean basically we had a mound of debt and we realized, well more Melvin realized that we really need to get rid of it. And eventually he got to the point where he was so frustrated with our student loan debt, our credit card debt, and probably frustrated with me. - So you're the free spirit. - Oh definitely. - Total nerd, total nerd. - We're on the same team. Yay to free spirits. Okay, so that is one thing I get a lot is the reluctant spouse, right? The spouse that won't come on board. Okay, so since you were the reluctant spouse what would you tell a spouse that is like Melvin, who wants to be on board, what would you say okay, this is the best way to get your free spirits honed in. What were things that helped you? - I mean, he really wanted me to get on board but he also gave me my space to make sure I joined him on my own terms instead of just trying to drag me into it. And honestly, with him, seeing the worry and the fear, and I don't want him to feel like that. I want him to realize he's doing a great job providing for us, so I wanna make sure I made him feel like that. And if me being on board was gonna help him and us doing this together is gonna help our family, then that's what I'm gonna do, too. - Yeah, so the why behind it is huge. - Absolutely. - Yeah. - He got to the point where he said we need to change and he talked about ordering Financial Peace University over and over again. Eventually one night I told him, I said if you want it so bad just go order it. - It was kinda towards the end of a pay period. We didn't have anything. We had maybe about $150 left in our bank account. - Wow, yeah. - And so we're like look, if I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna do it now. - Okay, so what I think is so significant is that that could've just been another night, right? You just bought something online, it wasn't a big deal. But you remember the night. - Oh yeah. - You remember the time of day. You remember exactly where you guys were, so this was a huge pivotal point. It'll be a memory that you probably have for the rest of your life, that moment that you decided to make that commitment to do something different is what it amounts to. So you guys started Financial Peace University, you got into the dumping debt section about getting out of debt, okay, and then tell me what happened from there. - I think that dumping debt lesson just lit a fire in me, and I just got out bed, I said this is dumb. We can't do this anymore. I got the scissors. I said we're cuttin' all these up. Sometimes it's hard to admit that we had 17 credit cards, and it felt so good to get rid of them. It really did. - It became a whole Saturday ordeal. So literally from, it must have been seven a.m. by the time we were done with the lesson, getting the two girls up, breakfast, and then literally laying all the credit cards, letting our girls see that. And they're like what are these, right? And what is this for? I can still remember our four year old asking us what are we doing? And just giving her that experience so that she knows not to go down this path. - And that's it. And that's what I always tell people when they're getting out of debt. And those of you getting out of debt currently you probably felt this, because we say you have to be sick and tired of being sick and tired. It's this point like we're done. I talk to some people and they're like yeah, I think it'd be kinda fun to get out of debt. I'm like yeah girl, that's gonna take you a long time. You can wander your way in, you cannot wander you way out. It has to be intentional and there has to be a lot of sacrifice. So you guys started paying off that debt. You cut up the credit cards, you started down this path, and you guys currently, you've paid off all your credit card debt already, right? - Oh yeah. - We are, we're completely out of credit card debt. - Which was how much? - Maybe about 10,000 in credit card, give or take. - Yes, but since we started Financial Peace, we've paid off 19,000 in our whole total debt. - You guys, that's in a couple of months isn't it? - Yeah. - 10 weeks. - 10 weeks, okay, so what do you attribute that to? Do you look at it and you're like we just were not intentional before and now we're budgeting. Is is that you're making lifestyle sacrifices? How do you pay off $19,000 in a few months? That's insane. - We have definitely ran with the envelope system. I think that's been the biggest thing that's helped us, because we overspend a lot in going out and restaurant money, and when that envelope runs out, you're done. - And if you guys don't know what it is, it's like the best system and I did this for so long. So you cash out categories in your budget that you tend to overspend on. Most people restaurants, groceries, clothing, all of that, so you actually have physical cash. And it's a great accountability, because you see the cash and when it is gone, like you said, it's gone and you have to make a different decision on what you're gonna do. - Now it's like we're on the same page. We're looking at the same budget. We know how much we're spending for every category and the discipline that comes in behind it, after a while you just come to say I really spent this much in this area? What am I buying? It just really starts getting you to question certain areas and like you said definitely having the same goals. - Totally, 'cause that's what I always tell people is when you can agree on your money, you agree on more than money. You're agreeing on your goals, on your dreams, where you wanna go as a family, on your fears. So much is tied is tied into money. So what in your marriage has changed throughout this process? - Definitely our financial communication. And it was funny, a few months before we started he actually wanted to sit down and he asked me what are our goals for the future. And I was just like I don't know. I was like I'm not sure. But now I don't get frustrated with that question anymore 'cause I know exactly what we wanna do. And when we get out of debt, we wanna make sure our girls have money for college so they're never in the student loan debt that we're in. That's another big part of what we're struggling with is our student loan debt, and we don't ever want them to be part of that. - Yeah. Even if you're past the steps, maybe you're right now investing, you're saving for kid's college, whatever it is, no matter where you are, okay, we have a goal and so now every dollar we're just gonna be intentional with where it goes and it adds up so much over time. So you guys have, how much debt do you have left in your? - When we started Financial Peace University we had 116,000 and now we are down to 100? - A little south of 100. - So you're chuggin'. Do y'all have a date in your mind? Have you tracked it out where you're like our goal is-- - Yeah, so if nothing else were to change today, right, we're 36 months out, but now it's really just being more intentional about what else can we adjust here? Do we really need to spend? We're really having one of those discussions. - So would you say you're in a totally different mind, emotional space than you were six months ago, a year ago? - Absolutely. I think the biggest thing I keep telling him is even though we're not even halfway through with our debt snowball, we're not quite there yet, I have a sense of peace and just relief and I don't feel the weight anymore, 'cause we have our plan, we know what we're doing. It's an amazing feeling. - Well, thank you guys so much, again, for coming on and sharing your story. I mean, are they just not incredible? Right now if you don't wanna run through a brick wall, I don't know what your problem is, people. Seriously, it is just remarkable. When you gain control of your money, they are living proof of it, that you have control and you have peace. And you guys, I mean they still are in their journey of getting out of debt but the peace of mind that comes with having a plan and knowing what to do changes everything. And Financial Peace University, it is seriously one of the best things you can do. If you have not signed up, sign up. Click the link below, get more information, and if you wanna know more about the envelope system which is amazing, too, I'll put a link down below of a video that I shot earlier on that, so make sure to check that out. You guys, you're awesome. Thanks so much again. - Thank you. - All right you guys, the best part of the show, she works hard saving money. All right, Joanna said we paid off all of our debt two years ago using Dave Ramsey's debt snowball. And then something happened and we had to use our emergency funds. And then things kept happening for two years. We weren't able to get our emergency fund back to a thousand dollars until now. Back on track, guys, and we're finally able to move on to baby step number three. Joanna, that's so amazing. And doesn't that happen? It's like when it rains, it pours, but you guys are doin' it, I love it. Brittany said teaching him how to work young and the value of the coupon. Christine posted her goal tracker and almost halfway through baby step one! Way to go, Christine. Okay, remember you guys, spending money is not terrible. It's not a bad thing. You can spend money just when you are in control, you have a plan, and you're not spending out of your emergency fund when it's not an emergency. Thank you so much to Melvin and Danielle for coming in. You guys, stick with that journey. You guys are doing incredible. And thank you to Susan from Woman's Day, and I want you guys to actually comment below with your favorite household products. Now, I'll be checking those comments out later and picking one of you to win all the products that Susan talked about. So fun. Well you guys, thank you for watching this episode. And remember to take control of your money and create a life you love.